when traditions change...

When traditions change....

Every person has different traditions for holidays and different things that make Christmas feel like Christmas to them. It is crazy the way we identify our holidays by the things we do instead of the reasons we do them. Coming from a family with yearly holiday get togethers at the same house, with the same people, the same music, the same ornaments, the same story, and all in the same order, when things happen and shake the tradition that has not been broken for decades it becomes a time to reflect and discover what I am actually looking forward to. That has happened this Christmas for me. Long story short- it involves the hospital, divorce, and so many other factors that have changed what is "normal" for Christmas for me and my family. 

• First, questions without defined answers. 
• Second, mixed emotions. 
• Third, new plans being made.
• Last, acceptance and reflection.

I think the first few steps are self explanatory and natural for anyone (especially a planner and organizer like myself), but the last can be different for every person. This year I have had to realize that Christmas is not defined by going to my grandparents house on Christmas eve with the extended family as well as immediate, waking up early to see Santa has come Christmas morning, and spending the rest of the day lazy around the house. This year it looked a little more like this- small Christmas eve get together with food, presents, and the Christmas story without the whole family and minus a few traditions, seeing what Santa brought around 11pm on Christmas Eve, taking a road trip with my brother to my dad's house as Christmas becomes Christmas day and we drive on through the midnight hours, waking up late instead of early and going to a Christmas lunch I have never been to before with a different side of my family. Wow, for a traditional person that might sound like a nightmare, and I think that is exactly what the devil was trying to make me believe.

This is where Jesus steps in- and ultimately reminds me that no matter how many times I read Luke 2 on Christmas Eve it is so easy to make Christmas about the traditions instead of about the birthday of my King. Therefore, with traditions out the window I had to realize what it was we are celebrating. It isn't family (even though that is wonderful), it isn't presents and Santa Claus coming to town, and it most definitely is not the traditions that take place year after year- it is Jesus and only Jesus. How awesome is it to know that no matter the earthly circumstance or life changes or lack of Christmas decorations at one house and overuse of at the other or anything else that attempts to take away the pure joy of Christmas, it cannot be taken away because my salvation can never be taken away and that is found in the birth of my savior on Christmas Day. Go ahead and tell me something that is better.... just kidding because you can't. So long ago today, the history of everything was changed in a manger because there was no room for Jesus to be born anywhere else. I am sure this is sounding like the cliche Christian Christmas post, but when I really realized what was taking place, nothing means more than radiating with joy during this holiday time because of what was done then, and not what is going on now. So to finish out my phrase from the title...

When traditions change,  Jesus always remains the same.

I hope I never get to the point where my traditions must change in order to once again realize the real meaning, but I will always see the meaning before the traditions. Rejoicing because one day I will be with my king, Jesus, for eternity and I am sure the Christmas celebration in heaven will be more perfect than any tradition or decorations or anything I could even fathom on this earth.

clean your sheets

       Sometimes we all just need to clean the sheets....  now that you are confused let me explain. Every relationship we are in (between friends, parents, and every other person in our lives) has good times and bad, we all know that, but sometimes we can reach a place where we are stuck. We can be stuck because we were wronged and are hurt, we can be stuck because we haven't spent time with the other person, we can be stuck because the other person is holding something against us or vice versa, and on and on and on. Thats how every relationship works. Being stuck in relationships is like having dirty sheets. It isn't necessarily fun to clean them and take time out of our busy lives to make that happen, but it is necessary, and they only get dirtier as we put it off and wait to do something about it. 
       The process for cleaning the sheets can be easy or it can be hard. Maybe it's been so long and they have gotten stained; we're too deep that forgiveness itself will not fix the problem and other measures need to be taken. Maybe its easy, and all we have to do is throw them in the empty washer and dryer and someone is there to help us put them back on the bed immediately; the problem is fixed simply with only a little effort and met by the effort of the other person. Maybe they are to the point where you feel like you want to throw them away and just try to find new sheets; you either will have to make time to go out and spend money on new sheets or take time to fix the wrinkled, stained and dirty old ones no matter how difficult and long the process is. Either way, no matter the condition of the sheets, something will have to be done- we get to decide what we do about it. 

"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony." Colossians 3:12-14

       Typically in Scripture I've found that when God repeats something in the same passage it is probably pretty important. These verses speak into my soul. Basically, God has cleaned my sheets and your sheets (forgiven the sins we have committed against Him without us even asking and done more than enough to make sure when we are ready to come to Him we have clean sheets waiting on us and a new start in our relationship with Him); therefore, we need to take the first step the same way He did, and make an effort to forgive those who have wronged us, or hurt us, or who we find ourselves holding a grudge on because we haven't truly gotten the whole story or don't understand the entire circumstances. If we make the first step, and start getting the stains out, sewing up the holes and wash and dry the old sheets in the form of conversations and forgiveness, then when the other person is ready to return and figure it out the bulk will be done and the clean sheets can be enjoyed, and the relationship will be restored much easier if we have already taken the time to do our part.
       Forgiveness is a topic that is so hard to do and so easy to come up with excuses for, yet so important for us to take part in and make a priority in our lives. I find myself struggling with this exact situation often, where I am waiting for the other person to start washing, but I haven't made any effort to get the stains out. This may seem like a silly post, but I believe God is using this as a sort of modern day parable, and I am so thankful he is using me as His vessel. We all know how good it feels to lay on clean sheets, so if we are spending our nights letting our sheets, and relationships, keep getting dirtier and more messed up, then it will only be harder when we finally make our attempts to clean them.

thankfully inspired by the One who is greater,
                                           Bayly